was watching an interesting satellite TV programme yesterday. It
was a show which exploits TV’s obsession with cookery and
vets. The show was hosted by Ainsley Harriot and Rolf Harris and
was called “If I Can’t Cure It, I’ll Cook It”.
Whilst watching a poorly hamster nervously eyeing the frying pan,
I wondered whether Ainsley was the most annoying thing in the whole
deciding the most annoying thing in the universe I gave full consideration
to a range of annoying evils. Virgin Trains flashed briefly through
my mind but they were erased by the thought of Kelvin Tatum. Tatum’s
in-built ability to annoy me seemed trivial when compared to Noel
Edmunds House Party. The thought of Noel and his range of amusing
sweaters flashed painfully through my mind but then it came to me.
I knew what the most annoying thing in the universe was:
man who put the A into ABBA”
(the man who put BIG into 80’s pop group Big Country) and
his ridiculous nicknames had finally topped the charts. Firstly,
it is completely inaccurate. The members of ABBA used their initials
in order to form the name (Anna, Benny, Barrington and Antiseptic).
Secondly the only link between the members of ABBA and the Karlsson
brothers is their nationality. As far as I am aware, Peter and Michael
have no connection to the pop music industry, apart from Peter’s
harmonica playing on “There Must Be A Angel (Playing With
My Heart)”. Surprisingly ABBA do have a connection with Speedway.
Their 1979 hit “You Can Cut Across Before The 30 Yard Mark”,
reached number 23 in the UK charts.
would appeal to Porky to refrain from using this annoying nickname
in future and to ensure that he conducts accurate research when
formulating nicknames. It is also worth noting that the second most
annoying thing in the universe is the phrase:
they enter the third bend for the fourth and final time……”
third most annoying thing in the universe is the voices in head,
who laugh at me and keep me awake at night.
anyone else would like to make nomination for the most annoying
thing in the universe then please write or e-mail us.
your envelope “Greg Hancock’s voice, Wolfcry Magazine…”
H. A. Weasly (April 1999)
to the Wolfcry Gold page